Why did I wake up with my glasses on?

Training Courses, Training Courses, and why did I wake up with my glasses still on?
Well you just cannot make this stuff up. I haven’t had chance to hook up with anyone because every morning there have been company training courses. This combined with late nights working has left me very tired in the daytime, so all I have done is rested, being careful not to burn the candle at both ends and effecting my voice.
Second night in after work I went to the officers bar after work for a drink and met Duncan the guitarist. He is from Scotland, works the Pig and Whistle, which is an English/Irish style pub on the main promenade. So we had a drink and at 3am the bar closed and he invited me back to his cabin for a beer. We took the short cut outside on the promenade deck. This is a large deck below the lifeboats and it has sun loungers, deck chairs and shuffleboard boards set into the deck. Now when that part of the deck gets damp as it does at sea, it becomes slippery. Well Duncan and I were taking a leisurely stroll when all of a sudden he felt his feet slipping from beneath him. All I felt was his hand as it flayed out to recheck his balance make contact with my face breaking my glasses and sending a lens shuffling along the shuffle board and scoring a double ten!
Poor old Duncan was mortified at the injury caused to his new buddy. I felt really sorry for him and played it down. Went for a beer with him and refused a second explaining I had to be up again early for another training session. I left his cabin and suddenly found that I was completely lost. Only one lens in my glasses made my progress even worst because I was finding it difficult to read any of the direction signs. Mind full of the mornings before lecture on zero tolerance regarding alcohol abuse, I didn’t want to draw attention to myself and I certainly didn’t want to explain my now slightly throbbing eye accident. How did we get here I thought. Of course, we went via the boat deck to get from Aft to Forward. My cabin is Aft. Duncan’s was forward. The reason why I couldn’t find my cabin was I was at the wrong end of the ship!
So half blind I made my way up to the passenger area, got my bearings and walked as steadily as I could through the army of late night cleaners and maintenance personnel to the refuge of my cabin. Set my alarm for an early start, another training session, and went to sleep.
Struggled out of bed reluctantly after what seemed like five minutes later and made my way to yet another training session. This was of particular interest to me, when we were all invited to go on a tour of the ship. The training officer said to the class, this will be the only opportunity for most of you to see the passenger areas of the ship. Wow poor sods I thought. Many of these people are on board for over 12 months and they never emerge from below decks. Many of them asked for time to run back to their cabins to get their cameras. So we went for a wonder about the ship, and I realised just how lucky I am to be able to have a free run of the place. This went on till lunchtime and I went to the officers mess for lunch. My throbbing eye reminded me that I need to think about repairing my other glasses. I asked if their was any superglue on board. Decided it would be easier to go ashore and get some. I was told that it would be better to go after siesta when the shops reopened. Good idea, I could get back to my bed for a while.
So five oclock came and I went ashore and wondered around looking for a ferretaria to get some superglue. Supercola is understood in Italian, the same as Spanish. Got back and stuck my glasses back together. By this time it was time to get back to work. 8.30 – 1-30 so a quick change and off to work, a long wearing night but enjoyable a few drinks in the crew bar and home to bed. I woke up next morning went to the bathroom and noticed in the mirror I was still wearing my glasses which surprised me because I couldn’t see that well. It was then that I noticed that a lens was missing, and the frame was securely superglued to my nose. I remembered then getting to bed and deciding to tackle that problem in the morning.
I found the lens stuck to my pillow, I managed to get the frame off my nose along with a chunk of superglue congealed skin ! now I need to reglue my glasses and perhaps give them a day or so to dry!
In Naples today, I need to go ashore and buy another tube of superglue. The one I used yesterday is stuck to my dressing table and when I tried to pull it off superglue skwirted all over my fingers which now keep trying to stick together and the bar of soap that I have been trying to wash it off with.
So I have a big red mark on the bridge of my nose webbed fingers so God only knows what impression I would create if I was able to present myself for work tonight. I say if because I have just discovered that whilst writing this article on my laptop, my elbows have become stuck to this dressing table. Help !